“ When a relationship dies do we ever really give up the ghost or are we forever haunted by the spirits of relationships past?”
2 years ago, I went through the most difficult time of my life. I had my very first major (major) broken heart. I cried every night and stayed in bed the whole day. I was sad every single day. I was depressed every single second. Every breath turned into a sob. I was devastated.
Then numbness came. I wasn't feeling anything anymore. I didn't care if I didn't washed my hair or changed my clothes. I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I watched TV but did not understood anything. I read books but never finished even the 1st chapter. I was just in my room, in bed, staring at the ceiling and feeling nothing.
Then a friend texted me something that changed my life. "Stop loving someone who takes you for granted and makes you feel like you are worthless." And I did. I stopped loving him. I got out of bed, took a bath, changed to a nice dress, put on my make-up, wore my high heeled shoes and went out with my girl friends. And for the first time, in months, I was feeling better. I was out, having the grandest time and meeting new people. Then it hit me...Oh my gosh, I am back! The me that I lost when I was in that unhealthy relationship was finally found. I missed me.
I believe that if a person experience pain and heart ache because of losing a loved one can only survive because of the people he/she is surrounded with. I was very lucky that my family were all there to make sure I was being taken care of. They gave me the space and time to get through the pain without asking me to do what they expected me to do. My friends, who always lend their ears to listen to my whining, complaining and crying. They were always there to give me the best advise and tells me all those funny stories that would always make me laugh. These people kept me sane. They are the ones who showed me how important life is. They held my hand while I get back on my feet. They were my pillars of strength.
Now that I have fully moved on, I am paying it forward. Trying to help my friends that are going through the same thing I did. I always tell them to go through the pain. Cry it out, get mad, get depressed, stay away from everyone and hate the person who made you feel that way. Then accept the fact that he/she may never come back again and then move on with your life. The love will always be there and sometimes you will miss that person, but that's ok, that's just being human. Cherish all the good memories no matter how bad the relationship ended. These memories will be a validation that YOU are the best he/she ever had.
" No matter who broke your heart, or how long it takes to heal, you’ll never get through it without your friends."
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